Review: Sacrifice by Brigid Kemmerer

Sacrifice
by Brigid Kemmerer
Series: Elementals, #5
Released on: September 30, 2014
Publisher: Allen & Unwin (AUS)/ Kensington Teen (US)
Rating: 2 stars
Word Rating: Why you disappoint me?
Reviewed by: Mel

Earth. Fire. Air. Water.

One misstep and they lose it all. For the last time.

Michael Merrick understands pressure. He's the only parent his three brothers have had for years. His power to control Earth could kill someone if he miscalculates. Now an Elemental Guide has it in for his family, and he's all that stands in the way.

His girlfriend, Hannah, understands pressure too. She's got a child of her own, and a job as a firefighter that could put her life in danger at any moment.

But there are people who have had enough of Michael's defiance, his family's 'bad luck'. Before he knows it, Michael's enemies have turned into the Merricks' enemies, and they're armed for war.

They're not interested in surrender. But Michael isn't the white flag type anyway. Everything is set for the final showdown.

Four elements, one family. Will they hold together, or be torn apart?

Review: Camp Payback by J. K. Rock

Camp Payback
J. K. Rock
Series: Camp Boyfriend, #2
Released: April 29th, 2014
Publisher: Spencer Hill Press
Rating: 2 stars
Word Rating: Yeah whatever goodbye, book
Reviewed by: Mel

Alex has big plans for camp this year, starting with making it the best summer ever.

Having fun and breaking some rules will get her the payback she wants against her parents and her ex-boyfriend. Because of his disgusting texts, she's headed to a super strict all-girls school in the fall. Then she meets Javier and revenge doesn't seem nearly as important as getting to know the troubled loner determined to keep a low profile at camp. But Alex's trouble-magnet personality and Javier's need to stay in the background don't mix nearly as well as their irresistible chemistry. With her home life eroding under her feet and her last year of summer camp speeding to a close, Alex wants to make her mark on the world and squeeze every bit of fun out of her time with Javier. Too bad her old plans for revenge turn back on her just in time to ruin everything. Will she lose Javier too?

Review: Sea of Shadows by Kelley Armstrong

Sea of Shadows
Kelley Armstrong
Series: Age of Legends, #1
Released: April 1st, 2014
Publisher: HarperCollins
Rating: 2 stars
Word Rating: *pig like snoring in the background*
Reviewed by: Mel

In the Forest of the Dead, where the empire’s worst criminals are exiled, twin sisters Moria and Ashyn are charged with a dangerous task. For they are the Keeper and the Seeker, and each year they must quiet the enraged souls of the damned.

Only this year, the souls will not be quieted.

Ambushed and separated by an ancient evil, the sisters’ journey to find each other sends them far from the only home they’ve ever known. Accompanied by a stubborn imperial guard and a dashing condemned thief, the girls cross a once-empty wasteland, now filled with reawakened monsters of legend, as they travel to warn the emperor. But a terrible secret awaits them at court—one that will alter the balance of their world forever.

Review: The Impossible Knife of Memory by Laurie Halse Anderson

The Impossible Knife of Memory
Laurie Halse Anderson
Series: None
Released: January 7th, 2014
Publisher: Viking Juvenile
Rating: 2 stars
Word Rating: Woe is me
Reviewed by: Mel

For the past five years, Hayley Kincaid and her father, Andy, have been on the road, never staying long in one place as he struggles to escape the demons that have tortured him since his return from Iraq. Now they are back in the town where he grew up so Hayley can attend school. Perhaps, for the first time, Hayley can have a normal life, put aside her own painful memories, even have a relationship with Finn, the hot guy who obviously likes her but is hiding secrets of his own.

Will being back home help Andy’s PTSD, or will his terrible memories drag him to the edge of hell, and drugs push him over? The Impossible Knife of Memory is Laurie Halse Anderson at her finest: compelling, surprising, and impossible to put down.

Procrastination Reviews: Tsarina and Fire & Flood

Because I am an epic procrastinator, I have many reviews left unwritten. I keep telling myself I'll write a review, I try (if I even get that far), then I don't. Because after a few months, you've forgotten pretty much everything and all the stuff you have left to say are only enough content for mini-reviews, right? Right. Here are those mini-reviews. They won't be like my regular reviews, or very thorough, but you'll get the basic idea and it diminishes some of my guilt; one I recommend, the other I don't. 

Coming Attractions: Fan Art by Sarah Tregay

Coming Attractions is inspired by The Perpetual Page Turner's Save The Date. Coming Attractions showcases a book that is not released for a while that I've read, and gives you a sneak peek (like a pre-review, if you will) as to what I thought about the book, since I can't post the review until closer to the release date.

Fan Art

Sarah Tregay

Series: Standalone

Release Date: June 17th, 2014

Publisher: Katherine Tegen

Rating: DNF - 2 stars

Word rating: *anguished cries*
Full review to come in May!

Reviewed by: Blythe

When the picture tells the story…

Senior year is almost over, and Jamie Peterson has a big problem. Not college—that’s all set. Not prom—he’ll find a date somehow. No, it’s the worst problem of all: he’s fallen for his best friend.

As much as Jamie tries to keep it under wraps, everyone seems to know where his affections lie, and the giggling girls in art class are determined to help Jamie get together with Mason. But Jamie isn’t sure if that’s what he wants—because as much as Jamie would like to come clean to Mason, what if the truth ruins everything? What if there are no more road trips, taco dinners, or movie nights? Does he dare risk a childhood friendship for romance?

This book is about what happens when a picture reveals what we can’t say, when art is truer than life, and how falling in love is easy, except when it’s not. Fan Art explores the joys and pains of friendship, of pressing boundaries, and how facing our worst fears can sometimes lead us to what we want most.

Review: The (False) Promise of Amazing

The Promise of Amazing
Robin Constantine
Series: None
Release: Tomorrow
Publisher: Balzer + Bray
Rating: 2 stars
Word Rating: The Promise of Insta-Love *gags*
Reviewed by: Mel (and Blythe agrees wholeheartedly)

Wren Caswell is average. Ranked in the middle of her class at Sacred Heart, she’s not popular, but not a social misfit. Wren is the quiet, “good” girl who's always done what she's supposed to—only now in her junior year, this passive strategy is backfiring. She wants to change, but doesn’t know how.

Grayson Barrett was the king of St. Gabe’s. Star of the lacrosse team, top of his class, on a fast track to a brilliant future—until he was expelled for being a “term paper pimp.” Now Gray is in a downward spiral and needs to change, but doesn’t know how. 

One fateful night their paths cross when Wren, working at her family’s Arthurian-themed catering hall, performs the Heimlich on Gray as he chokes on a cocktail weenie, saving his life literally and figuratively. What follows is the complicated, awkward, hilarious, and tender tale of two teens shedding their pasts, figuring out who they are—and falling in love.

Discussion Review: Her Dark Curiosity by Megan Sheperd

Her Dark Curiosity
Megan Sheperd
Series: Madman's Daughter, #2
Released: January 28th, 2014
Publisher: Balzer + Bray
Ratings: 2 and 2.5 stars
Fright Scale: 2.5 out of 10
Reviewed by: Blythe and Mel

To defeat the darkness, she must first embrace it.

Months have passed since Juliet Moreau returned to civilization after escaping her father's island—and the secrets she left behind. Now, back in London once more, she is rebuilding the life she once knew and trying to forget Dr. Moreau’s horrific legacy—though someone, or something, hasn’t forgotten her.

As people close to Juliet fall victim one by one to a murderer who leaves a macabre calling card of three clawlike slashes, Juliet fears one of her father’s creations may have also escaped the island. She is determined to find the killer before Scotland Yard does, though it means awakening sides of herself she had thought long banished, and facing loves from her past she never expected to see again.

As Juliet strives to stop a killer while searching for a serum to cure her own worsening illness, she finds herself once more in the midst of a world of scandal and danger. Her heart torn in two, past bubbling to the surface, life threatened by an obsessive killer—Juliet will be lucky to escape alive.

With inspiration from Robert Louis Stevenson’s The Strange Case of Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde, this is a tantalizing mystery about the hidden natures of those we love and how far we’ll go to save them from themselves.

Joint Review/Discussion: Indelible by Dawn Metcalf

Indelible
Dawn Metcalf
Series: The Twixt, #1
Release Date: Today (July 30th)
Publisher: Harlequin Teen
Rating: 2 stars
Word Rating: Ink-redibly boring
Reviewed by: Kate and Melanie

Some things are permanent.

Indelible.

And they cannot be changed back.

Joy Malone learns this the night she sees a stranger with all-black eyes across a crowded room—right before the mystery boy tries to cut out her eye. Instead, the wound accidentally marks her as property of Indelible Ink, and this dangerous mistake thrusts Joy into an incomprehensible world—a world of monsters at the window, glowing girls on the doorstep, and a life that will never be the same.

Now, Joy must pretend to be Ink’s chosen one—his helper, his love, his something for the foreseeable future...and failure to be convincing means a painful death for them both. Swept into a world of monsters, illusion, immortal honor and revenge, Joy discovers that sometimes, there are no mistakes.

Somewhere between reality and myth lies…

THE TWIXT

OK.  So here's the deal.  I read this book and could not believe how bad it was.  I hated it enough that I decided it must have been written with thirteen year olds in mind, because younger people look at relationships differently.  Because they haven't been punched in the face by life quite as much as those of us twice their age.  Mel saw my comment and decided that, being a thirteen-year-old girl, she should give it a try.  And then we had a conversation about what she thought.  The following is our chat log.

In this conversation we may spoil some very minor plot points, and there's a bigger spoiler toward the end, but we'll mark that so you can avoid it.

Mini Review: Perfect Chemistry by Simone Elkeles

Perfect Chemistry
Simone Elkeles
Series: Perfect Chemistry, #1
Released: December 23rd, 2008
Publisher: Walker Books
Rating: 2 stars
Word Rating: RAGE
Reviewed by: Melanie

A fresh, urban twist on the classic tale of star-crossed lovers.

When Brittany Ellis walks into chemistry class on the first day of senior year, she has no clue that her carefully created 'perfect' life is about to unravel before her eyes. She's forced to be lab partners with Alex Fuentes, a gang member from the other side of town, and he is about to threaten everything she's worked so hard for: her flawless reputation, her relationship with her boyfriend, and the secret that her home life is anything but perfect. 

Alex is a bad boy and he knows it. So when he makes a bet with his friends to lure Brittany into his life, he thinks nothing of it. But soon Alex realizes Brittany is a real person with real problems, and suddenly the bet he made in arrogance turns into something much more.

In a passionate story about looking beneath the surface, Simone Elkeles breaks through the stereotypes and barriers that threaten to keep Brittany and Alex apart.

Review: The Truth About You and Me

The Truth About You and Me
Amanda Grace
Series: None
Release Date: September 8th, 2013
Publisher: Flux
Rating: 2 stars
Word Rating: *yawn*
Reviewed by: Melanie
 

Smart girls aren't supposed to do stupid things.

Madelyn Hawkins is super smart. At sixteen, she's so gifted that she can attend college through a special program at her high school. On her first day, she meets Bennet. He's cute, funny, and kind. He understands Madelyn and what she's endured - and missed out on - in order to excel academically and please her parents. Now, for the first time in her life, she's falling in love.

There's only one problem. Bennet is Madelyn's college professor, and he thinks she's eighteen - because she hasn't told him the truth.

The story of their forbidden romance is told in letters that Madelyn writes to Bennet - both a heart-searing ode to their ill-fated love and an apology.

Review: Ink by Amanda Sun

Ink
Amanda Sun
Series: Paper Gods, #1
Release Date: June 25th, 2013
Publisher: Harlequin Teen
Rating: 2 stars
Word Rating: Disappointing
Reviewed by: Melanie

On the heels of a family tragedy, the last thing Katie Greene wants to do is move halfway across the world. Stuck with her aunt in Shizuoka, Japan, Katie feels lost. Alone. She doesn’t know the language, she can barely hold a pair of chopsticks, and she can’t seem to get the hang of taking her shoes off whenever she enters a building.

Then there’s gorgeous but aloof Tomohiro, star of the school’s kendo team. How did he really get the scar on his arm? Katie isn’t prepared for the answer. But when she sees the things he draws start moving, there’s no denying the truth: Tomo has a connection to the ancient gods of Japan, and being near Katie is causing his abilities to spiral out of control. If the wrong people notice, they'll both be targets.

Katie never wanted to move to Japan—now she may not make it out of the country alive.

'The liquid dropped down the stairs, and after a moment of panic, I realised it was ink, not blood.'

Review: The Impossibility of Tomorrow

The Impossibility of Tomorrow
Avery Williams
Series: Incarnation, #2
Release Date: June 4th, 2013
Publisher: Simon & Schuster BFYR
Rating: (A Very Generous) 2 stars
Word Rating: Ugh
Reviewed by: Blythe

The immortal Seraphina is forced to face the darkness of her past—and risk losing the love of her life—in this second novel in the Incarnation series.

Seraphina has been living for centuries, thanks to a special method of alchemy, but only recently has she really felt alive. She’s finally broken free from her controlling boyfriend, Cyrus, and after years of swapping bodies to preserve her immortality, is happily settled into a life worth sticking with. Because in this life, she has Noah.

But Noah might not be as trustworthy as he seems. After he delivers an ominous message that could only come from Cyrus, Sera is worried that her new friends and family will find out her secret. And as her suspicions extend beyond Noah, Sera is forced to wonder about her new friends as well: Could her old coven be disguising themselves right under her nose?

Will Sera have to move to another body—and take another life—or can she find a way to keep what she’s got, forever?

I won't make an attempt at sugarcoating it--The Impossibility of Tomorrow was a really, really frustrating read for me, in a variety of ways. Having been an impressed reader with Avery William's debut, as well as this novel's predecessor, The Alchemy of Forever, I went into The Impossibility of Tomorrow with reasonably high expectations, predicting for all of those expectations to be surpassed. Ultimately, The Impossibility of Tomorrow proved to be an entirely disappointing read, meeting a portion of if not none of my preconceived expectations. 

Review: Rise by Anna Carey

Rise

Anna Carey

Series: Eve, #3
Release Date: April 2nd, 2013

Publisher: HarperTeen
Number of Pages: 320

Rating: 2 stars

How far will you go when you have nothing left to lose?

When she lost her soul mate, Caleb, Eve felt like her world had ended. Trapped in the palace, forced to play the part of the happy, patriotic princess of The New America—and the blushing bride of her father's top adviser—Eve's whole life is a lie. The only thing that keeps her going is Caleb's memory, and the revolution he started.

Now, Eve is taking over where Caleb left off. With the help of Moss, an undercover subversive in the King's court, she plots to take down The New America, beginning with the capital, the City of Sand. Will Eve be able to bring about a new, free world when she's called upon to perform the ultimate act of rebellion—killing her father?

In Rise, Eve must choose who to leave behind, who to save, and who to fight as Anna Carey's epic tale of romance and sacrifice in the chilling dystopia of The New America comes to a stunning conclusion.

This review is spoiler-free for both Rise and the entire Eve trilogy

Not including this final (unfortunately or fortunately, I've not yet decided) and ever so disappointing installment, I do love this trilogy, and will not forget the emotional impact Eve had on me when I read it months ago. The Eve trilogy was one I'd recommend at any opportune moment available, and I held back on none of my praise, despite the fact that the vast majority of my friends felt indifferent to the first two novels of the trilogy.

With that having been said, however, I anticipate that it will be difficult for me to recommend this trilogy any further, because, as much as the first two novels may hold a place in my heart, recommending this trilogy would also mean I'd have to recommend this unfortunate installment, which is something I can say right now I'll not be able to do.

Review: Dualed by Elsie Chapman

Dualed
Elsie Chapman
Series: Dualed, #1

Release Date: March 26th, 2013
Publisher: Random House
Number of Pages: 304
Rating: 2 stars

You or your Alt? Only one will survive.

The city of Kersh is a safe haven, but the price of safety is high. Everyone has a genetic Alternate—a twin raised by another family—and citizens must prove their worth by eliminating their Alts before their twentieth birthday. Survival means advanced schooling, a good job, marriage—life.

Fifteen-year-old West Grayer has trained as a fighter, preparing for the day when her assignment arrives and she will have one month to hunt down and kill her Alt. But then a tragic misstep shakes West’s confidence. Stricken with grief and guilt, she’s no longer certain that she’s the best version of herself, the version worthy of a future. If she is to have any chance of winning, she must stop running not only from her Alt, but also from love . . . though both have the power to destroy her.

Elsie Chapman's suspenseful YA debut weaves unexpected romance into a novel full of fast-paced action and thought-provoking philosophy. When the story ends, discussions will begin about this future society where every adult is a murderer and every child knows there is another out there who just might be better.

Upon finishing Dualed, all I am overcome with is an overwhelming sense of complete and utter mediocrity. Running through my head last night, while reading, and ultimately finishing Dualed was a giant list of 'what-ifs' and 'should-haves' that, in my opinion, would have made reading Dualed a much more interesting experience. Should these issues have been addressed, Dualed could have easily been a four star read for me, but in the end, there are far too many holes in the world and the character development for me to give Dualed anything more than a disappointed two stars.

Review: Mind Games by Kiersten White

Mind Games
Kiersten White
Series: Mind Games, #1
Release Date: February 19th, 2013
Publisher: HarperTeen
Number of Pages: 256
Source: Edelweiss
Rating: 2 stars

Fia was born with flawless instincts. Her first impulse, her gut feeling, is always exactly right. Her sister, Annie, is blind to the world around her—except when her mind is gripped by strange visions of the future.

Trapped in a school that uses girls with extraordinary powers as tools for corporate espionage, Annie and Fia are forced to choose over and over between using their abilities in twisted, unthinkable ways… or risking each other’s lives by refusing to obey.

In a stunning departure from her New York Times bestselling Paranormalcy trilogy, Kiersten White delivers a slick, edgy, heartstoppingly intense psychological thriller about two sisters determined to protect each other—no matter the cost.

A few months ago I had attempted to read my copy of Paranormalcy, which had been collecting dust on my bookshelf for quite a few months. In the mood for a light, funny read, Paranormalcy sounded like it'd be perfect, and, even better, it came highly recommended to me by multiple trusted friends of mine.

I think I may have lasted about one hundred pages before I threw in the towel and abandoned the book. From what I had read, Paranormalcy was pretty much the book I was looking for to a T, conceptually - it was light, slightly funny (though I have the sense of humor that will inevitably have me burning in hell, so it wasn't exactly my taste of humor), and interesting enough. But the two things that kept me from having any desire to continue reading Paranormalcy was the extremely amateur and juvenile writing and poor characterization.

However, when I heard that White had a new novel released in 2013 that was apparently much darker than Paranormalcy, I was pretty excited, figuring that, over the three years since Paranormalcy was published, White would have a much stronger writing style and characterization skills than in her debut.

I am proven wrong. I think it's safe to say that, over time, authors grow more and more stronger writing style wise, but I think that, over time, White's writing style may have regressed in quality. In Paranormalcy, as much as the writing was excruciatingly difficult for me to plow through, what with the bleeping censoring and overall feeling that it was written by a teenager, it fit well with the fluffy and lightness that ran rampant throughout the novel. Mind Games, however, is much darker when compared to Paranormalcy, and yet the juvenile and immature writing is still there, and it is even more glaring in here than ever because it feels off with the general plot.

Guest Review: Saving June

Saving June
Hannah Harrington
Series: None
Release Date: November 22nd, 2011
Publisher: Harlequin
Number of Pages: 322
Rating: 2 of 5 stars
Reviewed by: Vanessa 'Sei'

When her older sister commits suicide and her divorcing parents decide to divide the ashes, Harper Scott takes her sister's urn to the one place June always wanted to go: California. On the road with her best friend, plus an intriguing guy with a mysterious connection to June, Harper discovers truths about her sister, herself and life.

Guest Review 

Saving June is going to be sat firmly on the 'not my cup of tea' shelf, right alongside my box of Earl Grey. I realise that's a bold statement to make, considering how mercurial my tastes seem to be at any given time, but this book and I seriously did not get along.

The story is about Harper, a teenage girl living in the shadow of her perfect elder sister, June. Soon after their parents get divorced, June commits suicide. After her funeral, an argument breaks out over who will get to keep an urn with the ashes now that their parents have separated. Harper decides to take matters into her own hands, steal June's ashes and drive across the country to scatter them in California. (Huh. Sounds like a more tragic version of the movie-length Nintendo advert The Wizard.) She's joined by her best friend Laney, and a boy named Jake, who June used to be friends with before she died.

Looking at the synopsis alone, you'd expect a really sweet, sentimental story. Harper doesn't sound selfish, she just needs some time away from her hectic family situation to cope with her loss, and Laney could be her shoulder to cry on. It would also be fun to figure out the mystery revolving around Jake's connection to June, considering they ran in completely different crowds and were actually very close friends.

Review: Eve and Adam

Eve and Adam
Katherine Applegate & Michael Grant
Series: Unknown
Release Date: October 2nd, 2012
Publisher: Feiwel and Friends
Number of Pages: 304 
Source: NetGalley
Rating: 2 of 5 stars

Sixteen-year-old Evening Spiker lives an affluent life in San Francisco with her mother, EmmaRose, a successful geneticist and owner of Spiker Biotech. Sure, Evening misses her father who died mysteriously, but she’s never really questioned it. Much like how she’s never stopped to think how off it is that she’s never been sick. That is, until she’s struck by a car and is exposed to extensive injuries. Injuries that seem to be healing faster than physically possible.

While recuperating in Spiker Biotech’s lush facilities, she meets Solo Plissken, a very attractive, if off-putting boy her age who spent his life at Spiker Biotech. Like Evening, he’s never questioned anything... until now. Solo drops hints to Evening that something isn’t right, and Emma-Rose may be behind it. Evening puts this out of her mind and begins her summer internship project: To simulate the creation of the perfect boy. With the help of Solo, Evening uncovers secrets so big they could change the world completely.

I'm trying so desperately to find something even slightly redeemable about husband-and-wife team Katherine Applegate and Michael Grant's return to young adult, Eve and Adam, but, as I was trying to think up some positive qualities that this book holds, I only ended up with the pathetic, "Well, it was a quick read...", and the equally as pathetic, "I guess it was original..." Clearly those two accolades - the only ones I can provide at the time, mind you - aren't the most enthusiastic, but this book wasn't mind-numbingly horrible. I just expected so much more from it, putting into consideration that the Animorphs series was my first foray into young adult as a teenager, and I really did love it. Unfortunately, my expectations got the best of me, and I ended up being utterly disappointed by Eve and Adam, but even if I didn't have such high expectations prior to reading this, I just doubt that I'd had have a different opinion of this book.

In a present day San Francisco, Evening Spiker, sole daughter of the incredibly wealthy and powerful businesswoman and geneticist Terra Spiker, is suddenly in a car accident in which she loses a leg, and severely injures an arm. Immediately rushed to the hospital, Evening is taken care of in no time, and she is healing at the same rate. As she is going through the quick healing process, Evening befriends a boy named Solo, who knows more about Evening, and Spiker Biotech, than he's willing to admit. As well as the mysterious Solo, Evening's mother, in order to keep her occupied during her recovery, gives Evening the task of creating the perfect boy. However, as this perfect boy, eventually named Adam, is brought to life, we have to suffer through three identical narratives secrets unknown to Evening are unraveled.

The premise for Eve and Adam is incredibly intriguing, and it's also very original. The book itself, however, is not. What could have been an extremely entertaining book - one that makes you stop and say, "Wow. This book had a lot of thought put into it." - only ended up being bogged down by horrendous little tropes we see too often in young adult. Love triangle? Check. Insta-love? Check. Stereotypical promiscuous best friend in which the main character lives her sexual life through? Check. The love interests saying their 'I love you''s after having a few conversations? Check. With all of those tropes, and quite a few more, making their appearances in Eve and Adam, this book turns in to a book with a whole lot of promise, but that promise is only thrown in the garbage to make way for romance. Yet another young adult trope to add to Eve and Adam's lengthy list.

Review: The Dead Girls Detective Agency

The Dead Girls Detective Agency
Suzy Cox
Series: Unknown, but probably
Release Date: September 18th, 2012
Publisher: HarperTeen
Number of Pages: 384
Source: Edelweiss
Rating: 2 of 5 stars

When Charlotte comes to after being pushed onto the subway tracks, she is informed by a group of teenage girls that she is dead…they all are. Meet the Dead Girls Detective Agency. With the support of these dynamic girls—including fashionable Lorna, who can’t wait to find out if the devil actually wears Prada, and nerdy Nancy, who insists on staying in limbo to help out other girls—Charlotte follows leads and tracks down clues to solve her own murder. With plenty of juicy mysteries and some pretty cute guys, readers are sure to fall in love with this fun and suspenseful page-turner! 

I don’t have much to say about The Dead Girls Detective Agency, and the hardest reviews to write are for the books I don’t have much to say for.

The Dead Girls Detective Agency is about a girl named Charlotte, who, one day, is murdered, being pushed onto a train track. As a teenager who was murdered, Charlotte is immediately brought into The Dead Girls Detective Agency. Her purpose in The Dead Girls Detective Agency is to find her killer, and, in doing so, go to heaven.

I picked up this book because I was looking for a cute, quick and funny read, and this book seemed like it would be exactly that. In hindsight, I should have picked up a different book (Social Suicide, perhaps?), because, while it was a very quick read, I didn’t find it to be very cute or funny. In fact, more often than not, I found it to be depressing rather than cute. And about the humor in The Dead Girls Detective Agency… it just didn’t work. The jokes in this book feel (and are) forced, and their turnout is at best receiving a slight giggle from me, or a miniscule smirk, but that’s it. Most of the jokes in this book were just trying too hard, and just weren’t funny like I had hoped.

Review: A Discovery of Witches by Deborah Harkness

A Discovery of Witches
Deborah Harkness
Series: All Souls Trilogy, #1
Release Date: February 8th, 2011
Publisher: Viking Adult
Number of Pages: 579
Source: Amazon
Rating: 2 of 5 stars

A richly inventive novel about a centuries-old vampire, a spellbound witch, and the mysterious manuscript that draws them together.

Deep in the stacks of Oxford's Bodleian Library, young scholar Diana Bishop unwittingly calls up a bewitched alchemical manuscript in the course of her research. Descended from an old and distinguished line of witches, Diana wants nothing to do with sorcery; so after a furtive glance and a few notes, she banishes the book to the stacks. But her discovery sets a fantastical underworld stirring, and a horde of daemons, witches, and vampires soon descends upon the library. Diana has stumbled upon a coveted treasure lost for centuries-and she is the only creature who can break its spell.

Debut novelist Deborah Harkness has crafted a mesmerizing and addictive read, equal parts history and magic, romance and suspense. Diana is a bold heroine who meets her equal in vampire geneticist Matthew Clairmont, and gradually warms up to him as their alliance deepens into an intimacy that violates age-old taboos. This smart, sophisticated story harks back to the novels of Anne Rice, but it is as contemporary and sensual as the Twilight series-with an extra serving of historical realism.

Eight of my friends gave this book five stars.
Ten gave it four stars.
Three gave it three stars.
No one gave it less than three stars.

Then there's me, giving this book two stars. The only explanation? I'm weird. There's not much I can say about this book, not in fear of spoiling something (honestly, I don't think there's much to spoil), but because nothing really happened, and I suppose that is my reason enough for not liking this book as I had hoped I would.

Like Hereafter, A Discovery of Witches is, in all honesty, a series of obstacles placed upon Diana and Matthew only to add stress to their relationship. And what a relationship it is! /end sarcasm\ I'm not sure I understand where you're coming from, Diana... At first, you try to avoid Matthew at all costs. Then, on the next page, you're flirting with him. Then (view spoiler)[you're married and are pregnant with his child. How long have you guys known each other? Just wondering... (hide spoiler)] As you may have noticed, I've placed this book on my shelf entitled, "take-your-insta-love-and-leave", because, in a sense, their relationship was insta-love (something I'm not very fond of).